paigeeatscereal's Journal

paigeeatscereal's Journal

paigeeatscereal

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]

[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[
Jun 27 2006
]

new livehournal again, i know.
it's Paperthin_Paige

Add me[:

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[
Jun 27 2006
]

[ mood | I don't know ]

My mom's freaking out again. She takes everything way too far. Ellen accidently locked us all out, and me mom starting cussing and doing this annoying 'angry sigh'. I hate it when she des this. I mean, it was an accidnt, way too make my best friend feel like shit. We went as far as picking the lock with our jewelry, and breaking all of it. She doesn't even care, or apologize. We got back in eventually, and she jus went to her rom and went to sleep. Typical mom.

Well one good deed she did is drop off a letter I got in the mail today. From Colton. I've got to say, I'm really relieved. I had this feeling something was going wrong, but it's really the opposite. It seems like Colton really does care, I wasn't sure at first after all this bullshit Rickey had been telling me. I can't wait for him to get his 24 pass. I want to see him more than anything. I've been on edge lately, and he's just what I need right now. I like him a lot a lot a lot. Which is good, obviously, I just hope he sincerely likes me as much as he says he does.

I don't know why I'm always worried about things I probably shouldn't be worried about. I guess because I USED to get let down a lot, but I don't anymore, I have people I can depend on, so why does this still happen?

I've noticed that I get along with few people now days. Since I've grown so close to Ellen, it'slike I'm only used to her, everyone else is doesn't feel right. I mean yeah, a few people, but not many. Probably just like Meghann and Mallory, maybe Tiffy. Of course Colton, but I'm talking about friends. It's kind of weird, I haven't had a friend put up with all my shit for this long, not get tired of me, and not replace me. I love Ellen and I love that she's my best friend, I'm just not used to having these people actually care about me. It's the best feeling, but I'm so worried that I might mess it all up. I can't take starting over again.

I have a perfect life right now, but I'm always scared of fucking that up. Living the life puts you under a lot of pressure, I'd say.

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[
Jun 20 2006
]

[ mood | confused ]

Alright well,
I'm at Ellens, like I always am, Desiree's here too[:
I've been sober for too long and I'm getting crabby.

Uhm, I almost got RAPED the other day with Ellen.
Another case of 'taking advantage of drunk girls'.
But, we're fine, and unraped.

Rickey's pissing me off like hell.

Colton's been gone for so long.
It seems like forever.
I miss him a lot, and I haven't heard from him in a while.
I don't know why, but I have a really weird feeling.
I'm worried about something,I'm not sure what yet.

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[
Jun 9 2006
]

I miss Colton. I'm going to write him soon, now that I have the address. He said he can get a pass for 24 hours to come see me in two weeks, I hope he can.

Other than that, everything's the same.

Which for once is good,
I have my best friend Ellen, I love her more than anything
I have my boyfriend Colton, who I miss obviously
It's summer, so no school stress
And I've been able to get fucked up whenever I want

Sweet life?
Yeaaaa.

Look at these pictures I found on my photobucket from the beginning of 9th grade:

comments (1)

[
May 25 2006
]

I don't get why livejournal won't let me use a picture of myself for my picture.
I tried it several different ways, not working.

I uploaded them from files, nope.
From photobucket, nope.

What the hell. Someone help me?

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[
May 24 2006
]

Last friday was the best.
Me & Ellen talked about everything for hours, we found ourselves, and realized so much shit.
I was amazing, I LOVED it.

Today I took too many pills I guess and was puking in school so I went home at approx. 10:18 and slept till 7.
I told the school and my dad I had a terrible stomach ache, nothing about pills. Duh?

Colton's still in rehab. I miss him.
Tiffy says he's going to break up with me right when he gets out. We'll see I guess.

Summer's almost here,

I'm not finishing what I'm writing, Rickeys here now, PEACE!

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[
May 15 2006
]

I want to change my hair (again)
but there's no hair left to change.
Fuuuck.

I almost died Saturday night!
I probably would've if it weren't for Ellen
staying there with me.
She's the best friend I could ever ask for, she keeps me going, I'm so lucky to have her.

Mothers day was good.
My mom liked the painting I made for her.
I missed her so much while she was in london.

I saw Colton Sunday as well, it was nice [:

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[
May 13 2006
]

Colton and I are dating as of 5/12
Stevo's birthday haha

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[
May 11 2006
]

TRIPLE C'S!

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[
May 8 2006
]

This is all going to end

all of it

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[
May 8 2006
]

I'm tired of my life going great for a week
then turning back into shit the next.

I'm tired of everyone fucking around with me.
It's not funny anymore.

I'm tired of going home and getting fucked up,
just to make myself feel better.

I'm tired.

comments (2)

[
May 5 2006
]

[ mood | giggly ]

aye! I'm at Ellens, tonight's going to be fun, smoking pot (the usual)and making videos.
I have work at 10 tomorrow and I REALLY don't mind

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[
May 3 2006
]

Also, I'm glad me and Ellen had a long talk.
I don't think we'll have many more problems,
at least I hope not.

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[
May 3 2006
]

[ mood | grateful ]

Working at Quizno's is the best. Maybe it's not just the job, but a lot of things seem to be going great.

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[
Apr 26 2006
]

[ mood | aggravated ]

I'm sick of almost everyone around me.
My best friend treats me like shit, and I'm fucking fed up.
If I'm your best friend, put forth some effort.
At least pretend like you care.
And be more careful with all the lies and bullshit you tell me.

comments (1)